Showing posts with label My Favorite Things. Show all posts
Showing posts with label My Favorite Things. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Sunday, May 10, 2009
I am Sullivan's Mommy
In the last year I've been...
-pooped on
-peed on
-vomited on
-sucked on
-pumped
-bitten
-crawled up
-screamed and cried at
-through 24 hours of back labor
-scarred
-late
-to too many Dr. appointments
-through 5 clogged milk ducts
-producing about 2 gallons of milk a week
-trying not to speed with a cryer in the back
-doing gobs of laundry
-spening around $1000 on diapers
-changing about 90% of those diapers
-woken up every 1-2 hours every night (except for 8 uninterupted nights)
-lugging a whole person around
...I've never, ever heard my mother complain about being my mom. This dawned on me today....
How is this possible? Is she some kinda superwoman? What grace...
It is Mother's Day and Sullivan is a week away from being 1 year old. The above list is really not meant to be a list of complaints. Really. I'm just making note. ;)
But do you know what's really on my mind as Sully completes one year of life?
-Have I been the best mother that I could have been?
-Have I made all the right choices this year for his emotional well-being?
-Has he been eating all the right foods?
-Have I been praying the right prayers for him?
-Have I been praying enough for him?
-Should I have spent more time with him during his first 3 months instead of shoot weddings?
-I regret not fighting to hold him sooner after he was born (I didn't get to hold him for 4 hours after c-section). What affect will that have on him?
-I regret not demanding to sleep his first night in the nic-u with him and being by his side.
-I hope he doesn't feel trauma from when we went away for 6 days and left him with his grandparents (at 9 months).
-Have I read the right books?
-Have I chosen the right parenting style?
-I crave happiness for him.
-I plead for his health.
-I pray he'll have an awesome relationship with his Savior.
-I desperately hope I can give him the opportunities for a future filled with love, happiness, adventure, and success.
-I ache for him. I hope and pray I can be the mother that God designed me to be for Sullivan.
Being a mother has been an incredibly emotional and physical experience thus far. And it has only been one year. My perception of, appreciation, and love for my own mother has been changed dramatically.
Could you possibly comprehend how much I love being Sullivan's Mommy?
In the past year my baby boy has...
-smiled at me
-kissed me
-squeezed me
-cooed at me
-reached for me
-snuggled me
-rolled over, sat up, crawled, stood up, walked
-grown (gained 18 pounds!)
-called me "Mama"
-danced
-clapped
-leaned on my shoulder
-showed a love for mechanics, water, spoons, music, and books :)
-played with his puppy
-squealed
-given the goofiest, toothy grin
-woken up with smiles and kisses for me every morning (since he's been able)
-napped in my arms
-splashed in the tub
-believes his daddy is "Superman!"
-given me a new view on hope
-made my husband a good, proud Daddy
-made me a happy Momma
-given me reason, and made me want, to strive to be better
-changed our future
-needed me
-loved me
-blessed me
-changed my life.
It is very difficult to describe exactly how becoming a mother changes your entire life... what that feels like... what is so dramatically yet delicately, subtly different about you.
Ryan and I were just discussing what things have not changed since Sully was born. We are still the same people. Same goals, dreams, interests... But how we live our lives... that will never be the same.
-pooped on
-peed on
-vomited on
-sucked on
-pumped
-bitten
-crawled up
-screamed and cried at
-through 24 hours of back labor
-scarred
-late
-to too many Dr. appointments
-through 5 clogged milk ducts
-producing about 2 gallons of milk a week
-trying not to speed with a cryer in the back
-doing gobs of laundry
-spening around $1000 on diapers
-changing about 90% of those diapers
-woken up every 1-2 hours every night (except for 8 uninterupted nights)
-lugging a whole person around
...I've never, ever heard my mother complain about being my mom. This dawned on me today....
How is this possible? Is she some kinda superwoman? What grace...
It is Mother's Day and Sullivan is a week away from being 1 year old. The above list is really not meant to be a list of complaints. Really. I'm just making note. ;)
But do you know what's really on my mind as Sully completes one year of life?
-Have I been the best mother that I could have been?
-Have I made all the right choices this year for his emotional well-being?
-Has he been eating all the right foods?
-Have I been praying the right prayers for him?
-Have I been praying enough for him?
-Should I have spent more time with him during his first 3 months instead of shoot weddings?
-I regret not fighting to hold him sooner after he was born (I didn't get to hold him for 4 hours after c-section). What affect will that have on him?
-I regret not demanding to sleep his first night in the nic-u with him and being by his side.
-I hope he doesn't feel trauma from when we went away for 6 days and left him with his grandparents (at 9 months).
-Have I read the right books?
-Have I chosen the right parenting style?
-I crave happiness for him.
-I plead for his health.
-I pray he'll have an awesome relationship with his Savior.
-I desperately hope I can give him the opportunities for a future filled with love, happiness, adventure, and success.
-I ache for him. I hope and pray I can be the mother that God designed me to be for Sullivan.
Being a mother has been an incredibly emotional and physical experience thus far. And it has only been one year. My perception of, appreciation, and love for my own mother has been changed dramatically.
Could you possibly comprehend how much I love being Sullivan's Mommy?
In the past year my baby boy has...
-smiled at me
-kissed me
-squeezed me
-cooed at me
-reached for me
-snuggled me
-rolled over, sat up, crawled, stood up, walked
-grown (gained 18 pounds!)
-called me "Mama"
-danced
-clapped
-leaned on my shoulder
-showed a love for mechanics, water, spoons, music, and books :)
-played with his puppy
-squealed
-given the goofiest, toothy grin
-woken up with smiles and kisses for me every morning (since he's been able)
-napped in my arms
-splashed in the tub
-believes his daddy is "Superman!"
-given me a new view on hope
-made my husband a good, proud Daddy
-made me a happy Momma
-given me reason, and made me want, to strive to be better
-changed our future
-needed me
-loved me
-blessed me
-changed my life.
It is very difficult to describe exactly how becoming a mother changes your entire life... what that feels like... what is so dramatically yet delicately, subtly different about you.
Ryan and I were just discussing what things have not changed since Sully was born. We are still the same people. Same goals, dreams, interests... But how we live our lives... that will never be the same.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
My new name. :)
Today I was telling Ryan that Sully has a new run of "words" he likes to say. "a-NaNa (NaNa-a-NaNa-NaNa...)" He's been saying this all day. Ryan realized pretty quickly that this was Sully's "Momma."
Isn't that great?! I finally have a name! I'm so happy! He's been saying DaDa for months. And then about a week ago Ryan had him saying "Book."
Dude! I'm seriously with this kid 24/7. I've been waiting for this for quite a while. How did a book get ahead of me?!
But it's all ok now. I've got my new name.
a-NaNa
Isn't that great?! I finally have a name! I'm so happy! He's been saying DaDa for months. And then about a week ago Ryan had him saying "Book."
Dude! I'm seriously with this kid 24/7. I've been waiting for this for quite a while. How did a book get ahead of me?!
But it's all ok now. I've got my new name.
a-NaNa
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
No, no, no?
Sully just learned to shake his head "no." Sometimes it seams to actually mean "no" and other times -like this- he's just so happy to be shakin'! Can you tell he loves his Daddy? He loves to do the back and forth mimic thing with him! He's always looking at Ryan to make sure he's watching him.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
25 Random Things
I was tagged to do this survey type thing on facebook and since I spent so much time on it I thought I should include it here. :)
Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. I love that this note is 25 things. I love the number 25. It's our "family number". My birthday, my sister's birthday, and my parents' anniversary all land on the 25th.
2. I have had all of my wisdom teeth taken out. 2 at a time. I was conscious during both procedures and it did NOT hurt. People have such a fear about getting their teeth pulled. Just relax!
3. I am always thirsty and on average drink a little under a gallon of water a day. (I know this because I really don't like city water and buy -and refill- gallon water jugs.)
4. I seem to be allergic to everything. The list includes: dust, mold, wheat, cats, dogs, hairspray, corn, ragweed, cigarette smoke, and grass. (I didn't just think this list up. I was tested and diagnosed. Milk and eggs were on list when I was younger.)
5. I have a BA Degree in Studio Art with emphasis in photography and digital imaging. If I had taken Psych Research Methods I would have a minor in Psychology.
6. I have laughed so hard that I threw up more times than I wish to count. (It's really embarrassing, and it totally freaks out everyone unfortunate enough to witness it.)
7. I have been a vegetarian for 9 years. It all started with a project that Adam Grise and I did in health class in high school. I remember drawing the slip of paper from Ms. Myers' (was that her name?) hands. "Vegetarian Diet vs. Regular Diet" I wish I had the oomph to be vegan. I just don't think I can take another thing out of my diet.
8. My sister, Becky, lives in Portland, Oregon and I miss her SO MUCH.
9. I LOVE my job. I work at weddings! What could be better?! I loved planning my own wedding and after witnessing so many big days I would love to become a wedding planner in like 15-20 years. Celebrity weddings? I think so! :) Maybe for me and Ryan's 25th wedding anniversary we can renew our vows, and threw a super monster "wedding" party! (You know, cuz I'll be rich from planning all the celebrity weddings!) ;)
10. I LOVE my job. I work at home! What could be better?! :) Being a mom is way more involved than I ever would have imagined, but I love it. I want more babies. :) I'm so glad that I am fortunate enough to get to stay home with Sullivan.
11. I'm thinking about homeschooling Sullivan. Something I never dreamed I would ever do. This definitely would not be for more than just his first few years of schooling. Maybe up to like 2nd or 3rd grade. It could be really exciting. I would love to see where his interests are and what he excels at and delve deep.
12. Apparently I'm a rule breaker. (Norm breaker maybe?) Sully co-sleeps with us, he is not vaccinated, he is fully intact, he is still breastfeeding (with no end in sight), and he'll be fed a vegetarian diet. Prior to his birth I had no intention of doing any of these things (besides toying with the vegetarian idea) but I've done a lot of researching, praying, listening to my own instincts, and refusing to blindly follow without asking questions. And there is a lot to learn.
13. I love the show wheel of fortune and really want to someday be a contestant! I watched it a lot with my grandpa when I was young. Sadly, we do not have a tv and every weekday at 6:30 I really wish we did. :(
14. I like entering contests. You can't win if you don't enter! I once won a $5000 diamond ring. (I do not gamble -I don't enter lotteries or do pull-tabs. Only free contests for me.) My goal is to win a car. I've been close. (Thanks Mo!)
15. In High School Stacy (Anderson) McDowell, Jill Larson, and I dressed in red saran wrap one day during spirit weak of my junior year. I can't believe we did that. Who's idea was that anyway!? And when your friend suggests something so insane, WHY would you say yes???
16. I love swimming. I was on the swim team in 8th grade but was told that to be on the team in High School, you had to be asked back. Never got asked so I assumed I wasn't good enough. Joined my senior year in college (very small -I joined during it's first year). I wasn't awesome but I really just wanted to swim. I'm not that competitive I just love to swim. (I had to quite 1/2 way through the season. I was getting migraines from the strain on my neck from turning my head to breathe -stupid. I had been in a car accident that hurt my neck earlier that year. Yada yada.)
17. In middle school I took Cassie Soukup and my 4-ish year old cousin, Allyssa for a 4 wheeler ride. We went up a hill that the little 4 wheeler was apparently not strong enough to climb with all 3 of us on it. It reared back (I may have braked a little bit), Cassie fell off, and we rolled right over her on our backward way down! Poor poor Cassie!
18. I have art displayed in the science department at the U of M in Morris. Irony. Two photographs titled Swish that I had shown in the senior art show.
19. I would love to have a darkroom someday. Possible retirement art hobby? This better happen someday or I'm saving my film camera for nothing.
20. When I was 12/13 -ish I was at a Hallmark shop checking out the Winnie the Pooh photo albums along the back wall when an old man came up behind me and grabbed a huge chunk of my bottom and then left. I was frozen, scared, and weak. What a horrible feeling. Later, I was mad that I hadn't reacted more strongly and actually wished it would happen again so I could go ape on whoever did that to me.
21. Growing up, my family went on 3 big vacations. Disney World, Disney World, and Cancun. All three were paid for with saved change.
22. In High School I got in huge trouble for spending the night at someone's graduation party rather than the friend's house where my parent's thought I was. Hugest regret in my life. Betrayed my parents' trust, didn't get to go on the marching band trip, etc, etc... But now I can see where it fell into place with God's plan for my life.
23. I always have to feel "even." When putting my socks on, the second one must be put on very quickly to ensure that the first sock was not on much longer than the first. (Same goes for removal.) My socks must be the same color, have the same amount of wear, and be hole-free. If I step on a crack, rug, shadow, or other off-colored turf with one foot, it feels "heavy" and I have to look ahead to find something to step on with the other foot (and on the same area of my foot) to "even" it out. I don't think about this struggle all the time but I am always unconsciously doing it. I know this because Ryan will try to throw me off just when he knows I'm about to make a crucial "evening-out" step. My body actually jumps to make that step rather than try to catch myself from tripping.
24. When I was around 5 I always complained of an itch between my big two and second toe and between my pointer and middle fingers on both hands and feet. My parents had me checked out at the Dr. -I don't think they came to a conclusion. I remember my dad getting so frustrated with my complaining, he always told me that it was all in my head. It STILL itches all the time and I still have no idea what it is. Also -the same "even" rules that are in #23 apply to the scratching. Has anyone experienced anything like this?
25. My husband, Ryan, and I have been together for eight years (5.5 dating, 2.5 married). We went to H.S. and college together. We've been on 1 cruise with both of our families. 1 cruise, 2 trips to St. Maartin, and 1 trip to Disney World with his family. 1 H.S. choir trip took us to Chicago. We spent a month in England on a college choir tour. In 18 days we will go on our first trip alone! We're going to Puerto Vallarta and I cannot wait!
Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. I love that this note is 25 things. I love the number 25. It's our "family number". My birthday, my sister's birthday, and my parents' anniversary all land on the 25th.
2. I have had all of my wisdom teeth taken out. 2 at a time. I was conscious during both procedures and it did NOT hurt. People have such a fear about getting their teeth pulled. Just relax!
3. I am always thirsty and on average drink a little under a gallon of water a day. (I know this because I really don't like city water and buy -and refill- gallon water jugs.)
4. I seem to be allergic to everything. The list includes: dust, mold, wheat, cats, dogs, hairspray, corn, ragweed, cigarette smoke, and grass. (I didn't just think this list up. I was tested and diagnosed. Milk and eggs were on list when I was younger.)
5. I have a BA Degree in Studio Art with emphasis in photography and digital imaging. If I had taken Psych Research Methods I would have a minor in Psychology.
6. I have laughed so hard that I threw up more times than I wish to count. (It's really embarrassing, and it totally freaks out everyone unfortunate enough to witness it.)
7. I have been a vegetarian for 9 years. It all started with a project that Adam Grise and I did in health class in high school. I remember drawing the slip of paper from Ms. Myers' (was that her name?) hands. "Vegetarian Diet vs. Regular Diet" I wish I had the oomph to be vegan. I just don't think I can take another thing out of my diet.
8. My sister, Becky, lives in Portland, Oregon and I miss her SO MUCH.
9. I LOVE my job. I work at weddings! What could be better?! I loved planning my own wedding and after witnessing so many big days I would love to become a wedding planner in like 15-20 years. Celebrity weddings? I think so! :) Maybe for me and Ryan's 25th wedding anniversary we can renew our vows, and threw a super monster "wedding" party! (You know, cuz I'll be rich from planning all the celebrity weddings!) ;)
10. I LOVE my job. I work at home! What could be better?! :) Being a mom is way more involved than I ever would have imagined, but I love it. I want more babies. :) I'm so glad that I am fortunate enough to get to stay home with Sullivan.
11. I'm thinking about homeschooling Sullivan. Something I never dreamed I would ever do. This definitely would not be for more than just his first few years of schooling. Maybe up to like 2nd or 3rd grade. It could be really exciting. I would love to see where his interests are and what he excels at and delve deep.
12. Apparently I'm a rule breaker. (Norm breaker maybe?) Sully co-sleeps with us, he is not vaccinated, he is fully intact, he is still breastfeeding (with no end in sight), and he'll be fed a vegetarian diet. Prior to his birth I had no intention of doing any of these things (besides toying with the vegetarian idea) but I've done a lot of researching, praying, listening to my own instincts, and refusing to blindly follow without asking questions. And there is a lot to learn.
13. I love the show wheel of fortune and really want to someday be a contestant! I watched it a lot with my grandpa when I was young. Sadly, we do not have a tv and every weekday at 6:30 I really wish we did. :(
14. I like entering contests. You can't win if you don't enter! I once won a $5000 diamond ring. (I do not gamble -I don't enter lotteries or do pull-tabs. Only free contests for me.) My goal is to win a car. I've been close. (Thanks Mo!)
15. In High School Stacy (Anderson) McDowell, Jill Larson, and I dressed in red saran wrap one day during spirit weak of my junior year. I can't believe we did that. Who's idea was that anyway!? And when your friend suggests something so insane, WHY would you say yes???
16. I love swimming. I was on the swim team in 8th grade but was told that to be on the team in High School, you had to be asked back. Never got asked so I assumed I wasn't good enough. Joined my senior year in college (very small -I joined during it's first year). I wasn't awesome but I really just wanted to swim. I'm not that competitive I just love to swim. (I had to quite 1/2 way through the season. I was getting migraines from the strain on my neck from turning my head to breathe -stupid. I had been in a car accident that hurt my neck earlier that year. Yada yada.)
17. In middle school I took Cassie Soukup and my 4-ish year old cousin, Allyssa for a 4 wheeler ride. We went up a hill that the little 4 wheeler was apparently not strong enough to climb with all 3 of us on it. It reared back (I may have braked a little bit), Cassie fell off, and we rolled right over her on our backward way down! Poor poor Cassie!
18. I have art displayed in the science department at the U of M in Morris. Irony. Two photographs titled Swish that I had shown in the senior art show.
19. I would love to have a darkroom someday. Possible retirement art hobby? This better happen someday or I'm saving my film camera for nothing.
20. When I was 12/13 -ish I was at a Hallmark shop checking out the Winnie the Pooh photo albums along the back wall when an old man came up behind me and grabbed a huge chunk of my bottom and then left. I was frozen, scared, and weak. What a horrible feeling. Later, I was mad that I hadn't reacted more strongly and actually wished it would happen again so I could go ape on whoever did that to me.
21. Growing up, my family went on 3 big vacations. Disney World, Disney World, and Cancun. All three were paid for with saved change.
22. In High School I got in huge trouble for spending the night at someone's graduation party rather than the friend's house where my parent's thought I was. Hugest regret in my life. Betrayed my parents' trust, didn't get to go on the marching band trip, etc, etc... But now I can see where it fell into place with God's plan for my life.
23. I always have to feel "even." When putting my socks on, the second one must be put on very quickly to ensure that the first sock was not on much longer than the first. (Same goes for removal.) My socks must be the same color, have the same amount of wear, and be hole-free. If I step on a crack, rug, shadow, or other off-colored turf with one foot, it feels "heavy" and I have to look ahead to find something to step on with the other foot (and on the same area of my foot) to "even" it out. I don't think about this struggle all the time but I am always unconsciously doing it. I know this because Ryan will try to throw me off just when he knows I'm about to make a crucial "evening-out" step. My body actually jumps to make that step rather than try to catch myself from tripping.
24. When I was around 5 I always complained of an itch between my big two and second toe and between my pointer and middle fingers on both hands and feet. My parents had me checked out at the Dr. -I don't think they came to a conclusion. I remember my dad getting so frustrated with my complaining, he always told me that it was all in my head. It STILL itches all the time and I still have no idea what it is. Also -the same "even" rules that are in #23 apply to the scratching. Has anyone experienced anything like this?
25. My husband, Ryan, and I have been together for eight years (5.5 dating, 2.5 married). We went to H.S. and college together. We've been on 1 cruise with both of our families. 1 cruise, 2 trips to St. Maartin, and 1 trip to Disney World with his family. 1 H.S. choir trip took us to Chicago. We spent a month in England on a college choir tour. In 18 days we will go on our first trip alone! We're going to Puerto Vallarta and I cannot wait!
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Sully's Kisses
A few weeks ago Sully started to Kiss me! They are not your average sweet baby kisses. These are fierce, ferocious, mad kisses!
He seems to burst into a kiss, grabbing my head with both arms, fists full of hair. He pulls my face right up to his wide open jaws for a few seconds before releasing. A little scary, but oh so sweet!
Two weekends ago I had been gone all day at a wedding. When I got home I received so many kisses! One right after another for almost 5 minutes! We were all laughing at his excitement. It was so great!
These are the things that make being a mommy so wonderful.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
empty thoughts
So I don't have a lot to say right now. I guess I totally just happened upon blogger.com... I wasn't planning on even creating a blog until about 30 seconds ago. So... current events? I'm sweaty from working out -I'm about to take a shower- Ryan is sleeping and Brinkley is trying to eat my necklace. Tomorrow morning I think I'm gong to go to a KS95 event thingy and try to win a key that might possibly belong to the Pontiac Solstice that they're giving away. (Horribly ugly, but I can always trade it in!). I like winning things and I know it might be silly to drive there... but I know I won't win it if I don't go, so... what have I got to lose? I have gradually become more and more addicted to crossword puzzles. I LOVE going to Caribou, ordering a medium espresso cooler and a Star Tribune and doing the crossword. I almost finished one today with no help from anyone, I didn't look anything up, and I have only 3 letters missing. !woot! Ryan and I are putting the baby thing on hold for a few months because I am really focusing on weddings for next summer and I don't want to be going into labor at somone's wedding. So we'll give it like 4 months. I can be cool with that. We're not too frantic about it right now anyway. That gives me time to get into shape. My back and hips aren't in such great shape as it is. I think I could use a little more muscle before I start gaining all kinds of crazy belly and walking funny. And whoever you are reading this --our families have no idea that we're thinking baby stuff (except for Becky of course) -just so you know. Yep yep yep.
My mind is buzzing
A list of things I love...
monday crosswords
sharp pencils
coupons
broccoli
wheat-free stuff
blessings
calling the monte carlo "mine" :)
when brinkley howls
the quilt my mom made me
caribou
singing in the car
water glasses
my crazy rush of ideas after drinking espresso
lists
underware that are a tiny bit too big
wheel of fortune
clear skin
my tongue scraper
hot pink nail polish
craigslist
reading the paper in cambridge
the cambridge wal-mart
being right
spontinaity
tweezers
saying i love you to my friends
knowing that God's plan even better than mine (and I make pretty awesome plans)
painting Ryan's toenails
typing
cleaning my wedding ring
peeing on sticks (builds anticipation for when it actaully says "positive")
thrift stores
looking at pics of me and ryan when we first started dating
skirts
talking
remebering
Thats enough.
Time for bed.
xoxo
My mind is buzzing
A list of things I love...
monday crosswords
sharp pencils
coupons
broccoli
wheat-free stuff
blessings
calling the monte carlo "mine" :)
when brinkley howls
the quilt my mom made me
caribou
singing in the car
water glasses
my crazy rush of ideas after drinking espresso
lists
underware that are a tiny bit too big
wheel of fortune
clear skin
my tongue scraper
hot pink nail polish
craigslist
reading the paper in cambridge
the cambridge wal-mart
being right
spontinaity
tweezers
saying i love you to my friends
knowing that God's plan even better than mine (and I make pretty awesome plans)
painting Ryan's toenails
typing
cleaning my wedding ring
peeing on sticks (builds anticipation for when it actaully says "positive")
thrift stores
looking at pics of me and ryan when we first started dating
skirts
talking
remebering
Thats enough.
Time for bed.
xoxo
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